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Official Contact & Profiles

Visual representation extracted from bumwine.com

Content Snippets from bumwine.com

"Call them bum wines, street wines, fortified wines, wino wines, or twist-cap wines. Whatever you call these beverages for the economical drunkard, this page explores the top five."

"As pictured to the right, look for the pigeon feces and you'll find this old bird.  As soon as you taste this swill, it will be obvious that its makers cut every corner possible in its production to make it cheap.  Self-proclaimed as "The American Classic,"  Thuderbird is Vinted and bottled by E&J Gallo Winery, in in Modesto, CA.  Like Night Train, the label distances the winery from this concoction by saying that it is made by "Thunderbird, Ltd."  If your taste buds are shot, and you need to get trashed with a quickness, then "T-bird" is the drink for you.  Or, if you like to smell your hand after pumping gas, look no further than Thunderbird.  As you drink on, the bird soars higher while you sink lower.  The undisputed leader of the five in foulness of flavor, we highly discourage drinking what tastes like a ghastly mixture of industrial waste unless you really are a bum.  A convenience store clerk in Show Low, AZ once told me that T-Bird had a loyal customer base of only the hardest-core regulars from the reservation.  Available in 750 mL and a devastating 50 oz jug."

"The history of Thunderbird is as interesting as the drunken effects the one experiences from the wine.  When Prohibition ended, Ernest Gallo and his brothers Julio and Joe wanted to corner the young wine market.  Earnest wanted the company to become "the Campbell Soup company of the wine industry" so he started selling Thunderbird in the ghettos around the country.  Their radio adds featured a song that sang, "What's the word? Thunderbird. How's it sold? Good and cold. What's the jive? Bird's alive. What's the price? Thirty twice."  It is said that Ernest once drove through a tough, inner city neighborhood and pulled over when he saw a bum.  When Gallo rolled down his window and called out, "What's the word?" the immediate answer from the bum was, "Thunderbird.""

"WARNING:  This light yellow liquid turns your lips and mouth black!  A mysterious chemical reaction similar to disappearing-reappearing ink makes you look like you've been chewing on hearty clumps of charcoal."

Key Topics & Focus Areas for bumwine.com:

Drunkenness

Warmth

Bad Taste